Navigating this city can be taxing, both physically and emotionally. After living here for two years, I feel more independent and secure as a person, but also more prone to stress related ailments (apparently I snore now, and seeing as how I only do it in the city, I am thinking it's related to my lack of ability to relax). I seem to fluctuate each day from being content in my life and loving the city to hating everything about it (the noise, the air, the people) and wondering why I put myself through so much anxiety.
I was discussing this topic with my friend Emily recently, and we realized that we seem to be going through life just waiting for the nervous breakdowns and doing everything we can to avoid them and just stay afloat. And when we do have these mental collapses, it is a challenge to get our head out of the mud. Everything seems to be going against you, everyone seems to be out to get you, and the city shows no mercy. We move through our days in a funk (or sometimes don't get out of bed at all), and are constantly questioning our lives, our aspirations, and our abilities. Then, miraculously, something clicks. Someone says something at the right moment, you notice something on your block you hadn't noticed before, an opportunity comes along, and you realize that you're going to be ok. And once you rise up out of the funk, you feel stronger than ever, and have learned from the slip. But inevitably, we know it will happen again, and the process starts all over.
So what is it about the city that keeps us going through the same rigorous process? Can everyone in New York really be so self-deprecating to constantly put ourselves through this, or is only concentrated to actors or people struggling to do what they really love to do? I don't know what it is, but it certainly makes things easier to know that I won't be here forever. I feel good about myself knowing that there is more to the world than this city (some people who grew up in NYC truly believe there is nothing else worthwhile to experience on the planet), and I know that I won't be able to to deal with life the way it is now forever. So I just go through each day knowing that in a few years I will move on and be stronger than ever thanks to my experiences in the Big Apple. And pray for those breakdowns to stay away.
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Your life will be what you creat it as. Feel and experience joy,love,freedom,happiness,laughter. Inner happiness is the fuel of success. sustain those feelings. "There is nothing that your suppose to be doing, only that what you want to do." = "follow your bliss." once you realize how to guide your feelings you wont feel like a break down is right around the corner. "visualize then you materialize." its the way i do it.
Hey! I know that you've checked out my personal blog (The DJF) and was wondering if you'd like to check out my new blog? It's a collaborate effort between a friend of mine and I, exchanging our different musical tastes and experiencing new sounds.
It's going to be a weekly blog where we exchange 10 songs and discuss them. Maybe you'll discover some new stuff. You can check it out here - http://10-10project.blogspot.com
I hope you enjoy it! Follow, comment, and tell your friends.
DONELL
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